A Naive Expat in Thailand

[Somnat]

Bureaucracy don't you just love it....... NO !!!!

But I am enjoying your narrative trials and tribulations with the young fellows application

[TBWG]

Bureaucracy don't you just love it....... NO !!!!

But I am enjoying your narrative trials and tribulations with the young fellows application

Well for my old mate Somnat, here is the concluding post!



Part IV



The Boss Lady now informs me that she and Turbo will stay in Bangkok for a few days to look for a dress for her to wear at the wedding. (The cost of this bloody wedding is fast mounting up).

I just want to get out of the place so will get a bus from Mo Chit to home ASAP. The Boss lady accompanies me to Mo Chit as I am incapable of buying a bus ticket unaided. It's about 3pm there is a bus at 6 o'clock but it stops everywhere and I am advised to go for the 8.30pm VIP (That over used phrase again) bus. This is sold out, thinking back this should have started alarm bells ringing,  but never mind there is one at 9pm and I am given a choice of seats via the computer screen and opt for 3A So 6 hours to kill! I lost count of how many
doughnuts and coffees I consumed in Dunkin Donuts and daren't ever venture back there as I think the Katoey on the till thinks I was hanging around cos I fancied him!

I foolishly thought that as the bus is scheduled for 9.00 pm that it would be there for boarding prior to that time, so ventured down to the station area about 30 minutes early. Jeez I have never seen so many people in such a small area in all my life, what it is like at Songkran does not bear thinking about! I then have a brain fart, it's Friday 30th April surely the Thais don't celebrate May day. I should know better the country with the most public holidays in the world? Thailand! Any excuse for a beer up and party! They are all going home for the weekend . Well less than 30 mins and I'm on my way....err NO.

To cut a long story short we finally leave at 11.00pm the bus guy is getting peeved with me asking every 30 mins is this it? but then he only has himself to blame he has told me many times over the last 2 hours that its next bus or in 5 minutes! When I finally board the bus a pock marked surly youth is sitting in yes you guessed it 3A. Now no big deal BUT why ask me what seat I would like and enter it in computer, print a card with it on if you just sit anywhere. So I point out he is in my seat and make him move to 3B he promptly goes to sleep and lolls all over me with various body parts. Still I need not have worried as this situation was not to last long.

Upon leaving Mo Chit we head off in an unexpected direction, but what do I know I am only a Farang, maybe everyone else knew but not speaking the lingo I assume the late arrival was due to some mechanical problem, anyway we now go down completely unfamiliar roads and very narrow sois where we finish up in the Bus depot. All change, judging by the bemused expression on a lot of faces they had no idea what was going on either.

I board new bus only to find pock marked surly youth in my seat again, make him move. This time however a lot of passengers are demanding their correct seats so its like musical chairs , I am now joined by a much more amenable youth so no problems there.

It's now past midnight so I must have dropped off whilst we retraced our route and made our way out of Bangkok. For those of you unfamiliar with the route it involves going through Saraburi (spl) and onto Khorat. This part of the route is quite hilly with some steep inclines to be negotiated, this has the effect of reducing the speed of those heavily laden double trucks to a snails pace, this is not normally a problem, but with the sheer amount of traffic this has caused a tremendous tail back. Don't know how long I slept but when I woke we were already in the jam which then lasted at least 20 kms before clearing itself. During this jam most of the Thais were fast asleep including the amenable youth who was now talking animatedly in his sleep, he was also grinding his teeth really hard and loud so much so that I thought he might do himself some harm, what with the driver grinding the gears every time he downshifted on the hills it was getting quite musical.

What was now pi**ng me off was all the pickups driving up the inside and then forcing their way back in lane every time they encountered a parked or abandoned lorry of which there were many. They invariably had a lot of Thais laying in the back and consuming beer and having a good time which rubbed salt in the wound. I must have now dropped off again as I was then awoken by the sound of rain pi**ing down, think the pickup Thais not quite so smug now!

Whilst we passed through this traffic mayhem I thought it ironic that I had not seen 1 police car or officer. Even the middle of road police stations were lit but devoid of life. Now I think those police stations are a good idea...... quick access either way in event of an emergency surprised they have not appeared in UK.


Well I eventually arrived home at 7 am, and I suppose the moral is being a cheap Charlie bit me in the arse, I should have coughed up for a taxi. Also NEVER NEVER EVER go by bus again from Mo Chit.

Don't you just love Thailand



TBWG   
 

[maraudingscot]

Well I eventually arrived home at 7 am, and I suppose the moral is being a cheap Charlie bit me in the arse, I should have coughed up for a taxi. Also NEVER NEVER EVER go by bus again from Mo Chit.

  true, but the taxi would have cost you 10 times as much and you would have still been suck in traffic!  You could have flown? aren't they doing flights again on Thursday, Friday and Saturdays?

[TBWG]

Hi Bums

Getting awfully near the 5,000 reads mark for this thread.   Admin put the Jeraboem of Archa on ice!

I'll collect next time i'm in   


TBWG

[TBWG]

Well I eventually arrived home at 7 am, and I suppose the moral is being a cheap Charlie bit me in the arse, I should have coughed up for a taxi. Also NEVER NEVER EVER go by bus again from Mo Chit.

  true, but the taxi would have cost you 10 times as much and you would have still been stuck in traffic!  You could have flown? aren't they doing flights again on Thursday, Friday and Saturdays?

Hi MS

Had I taken a taxi, I would have left about 3.00pm and missed the jams! Unfortunately the Saturday 'Happy Air' service does not start until 15/5 but for 1 person would have been the cheaper option.

Regarding your generous offer to buy out the Satuk barber and open a Farang Watering hole! Methinks the price would be rather high, after all the ambience and atmosphere alone warrant a premium, after all it does not come cheap creating that dull grey unplastered breeze block look. But the thought is appreciated! 


TBWG

[maraudingscot]

  true, that lovely breezeblock finish is hard to beat!  TBWG I though you was married already! or is this a relative! lol I am just being nosey. Anyway I am looking to come back over in November for Loy Khatong, but now see that there will be elections around this time, So hoping things will be less uncertain as they were during last visit.  Also gotta look at visa for gf to visit sunny Scotland!

Think gf is totally against the idea of opening a bar in Satuk, think she would prefer somewhere nearer the seaside, though just a bar does not make enough money, so would have to be a guesthouse too, that might work in Satuk  , as the time I spent there quite a few Farangs did pass through, on one day there were 6 staying in the section of the resort I was in 

Anyway, keep up the posts, very enjoyable. Always good to read about life in the rurals!


Stan

[swimming pizza]

tbwg. I love your writing. 
satuk bar may be a good idea. nothing fancy but a place for farangs to get a breakfast,afternoon drinks, low expectations just to fill the place for farangs in satuk.

Name suggestment: SATUK DIGGERS! 

[maraudingscot]

satuk bar may be a good idea. nothing fancy but a place for farangs to get a breakfast, afternoon drinks, low expectations just to fill the place for farangs in satuk.

Name suggestment: SATUK DIGGERS! 

  nothing beats a good breakfast, even if it is cornflakes w/milk and banana, toast and tea/coffee of sausage, bacon, eggs, beans/tomato/mushrooms, toast tea/coffee 

would have to make it a guesthouse too (added income) otherwise a dozen beers a night would be slow going! 

name? think something Canadian has been requested already!  but its a thought, nothing more. lol I can see the barber rubbing his hands with glee and phoning his wife already!

[TBWG]

satuk bar may be a good idea. nothing fancy but a place for farangs to get a breakfast, afternoon drinks, low expectations just to fill the place for farangs in satuk.

Name suggestment: SATUK DIGGERS! 

  nothing beats a good breakfast, even if it is cornflakes w/milk and banana, toast and tea/coffee of sausage, bacon, eggs, beans/tomato/mushrooms, toast tea/coffee 

would have to make it a guesthouse too (added income) otherwise a dozen beers a night would be slow going! 

name? think something Canadian has been requested already!  but its a thought, nothing more. lol I can see the barber rubbing his hands with glee and phoning his wife already!

Hi MS

As much as I would love the barbers shop to be a farang watering hole  All of those shophouses are owned by a Thai/Chinese guy who makes scrooge look like a spendthrift! So little opportunity there!

Although as a cheap Charlie I can make a 35 baht bottle of Archa last a few hours some of the patrons daily consume prodigious amounts without any side effects and when the 'canadian' is in town the Leo factory has to put on a night shift to keep him stocked up!

The marriage mentioned in previous posts is in fact my eldest UK son!   My missus 'The boss lady' who keeps me on a very short leash is currently looking for a posh frock for the occasion

We go back to blighty end May and return to Satuk end October after said marriage!


TBWG

[maraudingscot]

The marriage mentioned in previous posts is in fact my eldest UK son!   My missus 'The boss lady' who keeps me on a very short leash is currently looking for a posh frock for the occasion

We go back to blighty end May and return to Satuk end October after said marriage!


TBWG

Cool, I hope the Volcanic eruptions do not hamper your return, Airspace over Scotland and Ireland has been closed for 2 days again, they do have the occassional opening but most airlines have rerouted there flights to Northern England, but that is being monitored constantly!

I hope she finds a frock, Hope marriage goes well and to son.

Anyway if everything goes well should meet this time? 

[Lourens]

... they do have the occassional opening but most airlines have rerouted there flights to Northern England, but that is being monitored constantly!

Also known as an ash-hole 

[Starman]

We go back to blighty end May

Very optimistic that your missus will have found a frock by then TBWG.

Female,Thai and shopping all in the same sentence.

[dave the dude]

Hi No2.
Have a good time at home and at the Wedding.
Hope all goes swimmingly and that the plumbing is OK at home. 

No.1
 

[somchai]

Interesting reading. Keep the periodical log up!

[TBWG]

Hi Bums

....more musings


My stepson recently changed school and now attends an Industrial College, I had no input into the decision as the Boss lady regularly tells me I do not understand Thai culture, so Butt Out!

This met with my approval though as it means no further school fees! But I was at a loss as to why they chose this college.

As you are probably aware Thai schools are very competitive and have frequent inter school competitions to see who is Top Dog!

The industrial college had until recently won zilch, however they recently won some competition and the prize was 10,000 baht. So what did they do, buy school books?, err no, buy a computer?, err no, have a big nosh up for the staff, tempting but NO!

They hired half a dozen elephants and paraded through the Town with the staff sitting atop the beasts  and the students all parading behind in their best uniforms and I must say all those teenage girls looked extremely cute.       

I suppose the attitude was, well we have finally won something and we are going to make sure you know about it! certainly original thinking.

Don't you just love Thailand!


TBWG